i’m going to piddle

The other day, Wesley and I were sitting on the couch discussing how we were going to take advantage of the children’s naps.

‘I’m going to go mow the lawn and trim that tree,’ Wes said decidedly. ‘What are you going to do?’.

‘I’m going to piddle.’

‘What’s that?’ he asked.

‘Well. First I’m going to take these booklets out to the car. There I’ll notice that the car needs to be cleaned out. I’ll take a load quietly upstairs where I’ll see some kitchen laundry that needs to be put away. I’ll go back downstairs to the kitchen where I’ll see the sink of dishes and start to do those. I’ll notice a toy on the ground and start to bend over to pick it up, but then I’ll see the handprints on the cabinet and suddenly I’m wiping down all surfaces in the kitchen. I’ll then trip over the toy. So I’ll grab it and take it to the den where I’ll notice a house plant drooping. I’ll go back to the kitchen to grab some water and begin to water all plants down stairs. I’ll notice the dust gathered around the pots and make a mental note to grab a rag when I’m back in the kitchen. But then I’ll realize its been a while since I’ve checked on Ivy so I’ll go back upstairs to see if she’s still asleep. If she miraculously is, I’ll take a load of diapers downstairs to the garage to the trash. On the way through the hall, I’ll pop in to use the restroom only to discover an elephant taking a bath in the sink and water everywhere. I’ll continue on to the the garage to take the diapers out and venture back to the kitchen where I’ll stand wondering what I was supposed to be doing there (getting a rag for the bathroom. oh and all that dust). Then I’ll step on a cheerio, sigh, and grab the broom for the 3rd time. Then Ivy will wake up. And I’ll go back upstairs to get her while I try to remember to grab whatever’s on the stairs waiting on a ride up. I’ll sit in my chair and nurse her and wonder what exactly got accomplished. That’s what piddling is.’

‘Gosh,’ he said with a slight grimace. I laughed.

And off we went.

A day in the life. Kids on swing.jpg




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I adore you. 

Wes and I (with Ivy) hop on a plane for Chicago nest week for the wedding of my oldest friend. Not oldest being age, but oldest being first friend ;). And I’m excited. I haven’t seen her since my wedding and I’m excited to share in the joy of her day.


haha. Hi Les!

And I’m excited to toodle off with Wes. We’re sorta tossing our nine year anniversary (what?!) in with this trip and my parents will be there and so they can hold Ivy while we go kick our heels up.

But before all those feelings come, is first the thought that the plane will go down and I’ll leave behind my two eldest as orphans.

Bit of a buzzkill, eh? Welcome to motherhood. They’re really not joking when they say that business about your heart no longer being inside you, but instead wandering around with your children.

And so then the next thought is getting all our affairs in order and how I want to write the ‘in case I die’ letter to my children. (The what if road is not a good one to go down).

And then I remember this here blog. And how my love for them seeps off the pages. And I’m relieved all over again that they will have something tangible to hold on to if my what if’s came to pass.

And so. Once again.

Ev. I adore you. ‘Turn your eyes upon Jesus’ is still your bedtime song of choice and and so I get to sing in to you a couple times a day. And it’s such a good reminder to me as I sing to you; to let the things of this world (my anxiety) grow dim as I look into Jesus’s face. My prayer is that these words become etched on your heart and that you are able to live them.

I love you missy. You are my favorite little Evelyn.

Jackie. The other day I had to take Ivy to the dr. I was separated from your presence for an hour while you read books with Ev and your aunt and then we went to Chik-fil-a for lunch. I sat next you and as we ate, I reached over and rubbed your back. You looked over at me with your little ‘v’ shaped, close mouthed grin, scooted over towards me on your knees, reached your little arm up, hooked it around my neck and brought my face down for a little cheek to cheek hug. I might have melted right there in Chik-fil-A. I pray you always keep your tender heart.

(This is the blurry version of your v smile Jackie. Patent it bud, it works well).

I love you Jackie boy.

Ivy Mae. I’m so glad I get to squish you whenever I want next week. You fit perfectly over my heart and fill it up with a single snuggle. One of my favorite things is to watch your daddy when you squeal and clap and giggle at him. You melt hearts baby. Your face lights up when Dad comes home from work or whenever Ev or Jack run into the room. If you had a tail, it would wag. The delight you show and the love you give truly does warm the cockles of our hearts.THE girls-5THE girls-6THE girls-4THE girlsTHE girls-3

I love you baby. You and those cheeks and those squishy thighs.

Gosh. All praises to Him for these gifts of mine. May they always know how loved they are, not just by me and Wes, but by the one who made the stars and who formed their hearts.

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All about ivy 5-7 months

Shoo. Five months is not my jam guys.

Dad always remarks that Ivy does not seem to be following the stereotypical third child standards. Because whenever we facetime, she is always attached to me. None of this fending for herself. In fact, at five months of age, my describing words for the little darling should someone inquire of her were, ‘bored and hungry.’

Happily, she turned six months of age and almost immediately began sitting up by herself which was a wondrous game changer. So much self entertainment! And so much easier to take in the entertainment provided by her siblings.

Sadly, this new stage brings the, ‘aha, I now know how to sit up in my bed the moment mom lays me down for a nap.’ Coupled with a new teeth, my cat napper is taking record short naps. For instance, rock her to sleep for ten minutes, put her down, she wakes up, rock her back to sleep, successfully put her down. Run downstairs to see what damage the older two have created, unload the dishwasher, load it, wipe down the counters and hear Ivy crying in her bed.

I could have burst into tears. But instead concluded that I would not try to accomplish anything the rest of the day and just plan on holding the bebe.

There has been improvement. Today I was able to get a cake in the oven, and then unload and load the dishwasher before she woke up. Three cheers for cake. And the fact that it turned out amazing. Hashtag lemon loaf and iced latte! Woot!

But back to the little doll. It’s a good thing she’s sweeter than strawberry pie!6a65061e-dca8-48ee-baf2-4bc5659214b3img_2644img_2676

Truly. She is so sweet. Seven months is much more my style. Love and kisses for the sweet cheeks Ivy Mae.


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all about Jack. age 2

I like to refer to Jack as Absalom, who turned the hearts of the people.  It’s a pretty terrible analogy but it makes me laugh for various reasons. But it’s true. With a tiny smirk on that blonde head, hearts melt.

But we kind of talked about that already when Jack turned two. So what’s new with Jack? He’s sort of communicating! Praise hands and dance parties. We have deduced that he wants to sleep with his door open and this has reduced screaming parties in our house by close to 83%. Praise the Lord. (Oops, spoke too soon, or maybe it truly was the houseful of company and he’ll go back to this angel status).

Every other day he’ll pop out a new word without prompting and my heart flutters. For instance, ‘Ivy! Baby. Kick kick kick.’ A whole sentence. I almost fell over but I was still laying in bed and was spared a fall. I really like his rendition of ‘firefly’.

Have I mentioned that he has got the toilet thing all figured out? Another reason to truly rejoice. And another reason to cover my eyes as I look out the window where Ev has helped him remove his underwear to water a bush in the front yard. Most times, he’ll let her or me get him back dressed but occasionally, HE has to be the one to put his underwear on and so I have to endure watching him stick both legs in one side seven times before he’ll finally receive help.

Jack is incredibly trusting. Or fearless. Or brave. Or something. In June of 2016 Jack was tubing with his dad at 13 months old. June 2017 rolls around and Jack is now wake surfing with his dad. I truly do think his mindset is just, ‘well I’m with dad, so naturally it’s ok.’

His determination provokes a bit of awe in me. I mentioned he got a strider for his birthday and he was going to conquer it. And so in the blazing heat, he painstakingly walked his strider (definitely hasn’t figured out the gliding motion yet) down to the pond and then back up the hill again. And then was so incredibly proud of himself. Go Jack.

He’s such a boy. He’s such a thrasher. He loves to do whatever big sister does, whether running, hopping or jumping. He has a great smile and if he laughs, you laugh, its unavoidable.

We’re lucky to have him.


Love you Jackie boy.

(Our new bedtime routine involves me singing ‘Jack goes hopping into bed hurrah, hurrah, jack goes hopping into bed hurrah, hurrah! Jack goes hopping into bed, momma bends to kiss his head and we all go hopping down to the ground to get out of the rain, bomp bomp bomp. Works wonders. hurrah.)




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Poppi and megee

Two days after Davey and Jennifer left, Poppi and Megee arrived.

This was great timing as I was pretty ready to sleep. Cold + poison ivy + prednisone + benedryl wiped me out. And so after a couple days of sending the dear children out to poppi and megee in the morning, I felt a little more like myself.

They arrived just in time for us to party like it was July 4th. And once I realized how decent we all looked, the kids had to be removed from the car so we could take red door pictures before venturing on to the firework show. Which was kinda hilarious. The kids did enjoy it but I think the fireflies were almost just as exciting as fireworks.

Dad got Jack a strider for his birthday and we saved it until they arrived. It was truly one of the cuter things I’ve seen. Jack diligently opened up the amazon box and then got his first glimpse of the bike. He pointed at it and said, ‘um! um! um!’ and then turned around to me and dad and clamped his hands over mouth for a split second before his face split into the biggest of grins and his eyes shined with many many stars. It was adorable.

So was his determination to master the bike.

Dad too got to drive snazzy cars around with Wes trailing him with the drone.

Dad and Mom both could go into Jacks room (after I would be in there singing, rocking, crooning, praying for a half hour and then walk out the door to immediate bellowing) and just politely ask Jack to be quiet and he’d sniffle and roll over and sleep. Honestly?

We didn’t do any running but we did get several nice sessions of Yoga with Adrienne in. Some more peaceful than others.

Spent a lot of time out on the front porch. It’s really a great spot.

And it was really a great time.

Three cheers for family in town.

Hugs and love.

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Davey and Jen Jen


It’s been a whirlwind 3 weeks. And right now, all is calm and all are asleep. Ahhh.

So. Three weeks ago, Davey and Jen Jen breezed in after doing some eye doctor legislative stuff up in D.C. The day they came in, I came down with an epic head cold and was blossoming with poison ivy. Everywhere. Ankles, legs, torso, shoulders, nose, ears, forehead, fingers.

I met them at the lake and while I felt like my head was underwater, it was still a blast. Like I forgot how good it is to just chew the fat with my brother and SIL. And I forgot how much Davey makes me laugh. Always good medicine.

Wesley’s been filming cars and so Davey and Jen Jen got all dolled up a couple times to model cars. And it was such a hoot watching them on the big screen. We need to put together just a highlight reel of them driving around $100,000 cars.

The kids had a great time and I loved hearing all the comments Ev would say to them. One of the first days, I was napping with the kids and Ev woke up and went and found Davey and Jennifer and chattered on about everything and eventually told them, ‘my mom has coffee beans if you’d like to make a hot or cold coffee.’ Heart eyes. What a little hostess. And she’d snuggle up and rub their backs and say, ‘I’m really glad you’re here, it’s fun hanging out with you!’

I’m going to assume that Jack was having such a good time with them that when it was time to go to bed, he hollered and yelled so much because he didn’t want the party to stop. Seriously bellowing. So after trying everything, we would escape to the front porch and visit and chat and watch the fireflies and it was wonderful. And quiet.

The last night they were here, Jack was bellowing away in his bed and Davey popped his head in and very politely said, ‘You know Jack, you’re just a little bit loud, wonder if you could just take it down a few notches so I could go to sleep, you’re kinda hurting my ears.’

It was like flipping a switch. He immediately stopped and never made a peep afterward.

Too bad it doesn’t work when his parents try.

Jen Jen and I got to take the afternoon off and hit all the thrift stores around town. Jen has a great etsy shop and is delighted with the local thrifts spots here. So that was fun.

We, of course, ended the trip with brunch at Jacks; always a great time. Got to see a couple of the locals and picked blueberries at a beautiful Virginia farm.

Great times. Great memories.

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All about Ev. Age 3 

Someone once said that, for various reasons, three was their favorite age. I think Ev was probably two at the time and so I silently disagreed. But now, Ev’s three and I know what they’re talking about.

It’s about one hundred different things that I couldn’t possibly document but want to try to anyways.

It’s every time I’m in the kitchen and she comes in, ‘How can I help you mom?’.

It’s all the times she helps Jack go to the bathroom, ‘here Jack, I’ll help you.’

It’s how she loves all my friends and will talk their ears off as they try to leave my house-every step they take towards the door, Ev has another question she’d like to discuss with them.

It’s how she goes over to her Mimi’s house and picks a bowl full of blueberries and then tells her Mimi, ‘here! I picked these for you!’ And then disappears into the house and finds a quart ziploc and transfers all the berries and then runs back outside to join us and deliver the goods.

It’s the request for ‘turn your asparagus’ song at nap time. Which translated to ‘turn your eyes upon Jesus’. She’s requested ‘turn you asparagus at every nap and every bed time’ and asked last week when we were ever going to get to the asparagus part. I told her it was really just eyes upon Jesus even though it kind of sounds like asparagus. And finally, last night, she requested eyes upon Jesus.

It’s how she talks on the phone to her Megee and then comes out to tell me she’s talking to Megee because Davey and Jennifer were unavailable and Megee’s reading the newspaper and Poppi is relaxing. And then launches back into conversation with Megee, ‘and so…the main point is…’.

It’s how she proudly runs into our room to let us know she made her bed and even found a sparkly pillow in the linen closet and has decorated her bed with it.

It’s looking out the window as we drive down the road and remarking, ‘wow, look at all the beautiful things God has made.’ And then letting us know that we are now on Main St and that is sure is busy at Mad Local, there’s four people there!

It’s her memory which seems to rival that of an elephant. ‘Mom do you remember a wong, wong time ago…’ and then she’ll tell me something that happened a year ago.

It’s all her planning for the day which usually involves going over to Mimi’s house while I go on a little date. ‘Does that sound like a good idea?’

It’s the three full solo cups of cold water in the fridge. Why are they there? I have no idea but I’m sure she’ll be able to tell me all about it when she wakes up.

It’s how she’ll play forever in the sandbox. Or making seahorses with her playdoh.

It’s when she’s walking through our bedroom talking to her baby and says, ‘You’re killing me smalls’. (We died on this one).

It’s her love of worms and fireflies. Little beetles are ok, big ones are not.

Its her adoration for Ivy and her general encouragement to the family. ‘Mom you look so pretty today!’. ‘Good job baby!’

It’s her excited, ‘MOM! I didn’t know I was going to pump today!!’ as she masters the art of swinging.

It’s how she can never just say ‘weekend’. Its ‘the weekend because Dads going to be home!’.

It’s how she translates all of Jack’s grunts for us. He’ll be fussing in the car and she’ll say ‘Jack did you want to go to Mimi’s?’ ‘Tsss,’ he’ll respond. ‘Well we’re not going to Mimi’s house, we’re going to Jacks Shop Kitchen!’ ‘Oh,’ he’ll say and stop fussing. I don’t know how much is the power of suggestion but she will generally just suggest until she finally gets an ‘oh’. And then, ‘Mom. Jack wants …’. She truly carries on the most amazing one sided conversations with him.

Ev. We adore you.

Stay tuned for all about Jack.

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